Candle lit, feet firmly in snuggly, warm slippers and fingers rapping on the keyboard at a 100 miles per hour. It was just another night of gruelling blogging when a knock came at the door; my Mum peeked her head through and announced "I'm ready!" and disappeared through to the 'vanity room'. Rolling my eyes, I followed her into the room and looked at her wet hair. I hadn't blow dried it in a while.
I began pulling her fine hair through the big round brush and blasting it with warm, not hot, air and it wasn't long before her hair straightened out into a small, glossy waterfall and it was another successful night of hair drying. I caught a glimpse of my Mum's smile in the mirror and she said something quite unexpected,
"I didn't even have such nicely blow dried hair on my wedding day"
And I stopped. You didn't? You mean...what do you mean? She explained that marrying my Father was probably the most ridiculous mistake she's made and that on the day of her only wedding she had rushed to it from work and her hair was a mess and she didn't even wear a wedding dress. I remember seeing that photo and yes I do remember her looking quite 'normal'. For anyone knew, her wedding day photo could well have been a photo of them two going to someone else's birthday party; minimal effort and just about presentable. I suppose why should I be shocked? This is coming from the woman who had to clean the house and feed a family on the day of giving birth to me. I was a cesarean baby by the way.
I smiled at her and although the words couldn't come out, I knew I would blow dry her hair nicely for the rest of her life if I could. I guess in some ways I would hope to make up for all the pain she's ever gone through and I can't really do much to make her happy but if I can bring back her femininity and pride then it's what I will and shall always do.
It's something small that I do for her every two or three days (she's lucky enough to have bone, dry hair - no grease!) at night time and it takes me little of 15 minutes to make her hair from frizzy, wavy chaos to a sleek, gleaming mane. Sometimes I really feel like I don't have time or energy but I will always do it and now I will make sure I do do it. She was never able to go out and make herself look beautiful and she deserves that; my Mother is the world's most courageous and brave woman standing on this Earth. She probably comes neatly after Mulan. If there is one purpose I have in my life then it's to blow dry My Mum's hair.
The point of today's blog isn't just to tweak your heart strings; this true story was blogged today so you would go out there and do something for someone else. Anything. You know what you are capable of and if you can make a parent, family member or friend happy, it woud mean the world to me and to them. Something as small and trivial as hair drying makes my Mum happy and it definitely makes me happy.
So today go and make a commitment to loving others and making someone smile!
Have a beautiful day,
Cherry x
My Mum posing ... this was taken on a very special day. It was the day after
I broke up with my boyfriend and so she decided to take me to sushi. I wanted
to stay in bed but she knew some good food is what I needed. Mums, eh?
PS. She looks young, doesn't she? I bet you can't guess how old she is!
If there is one person who is often quickly mentioned in my videos, it's probably my sister. I try not to talk about my friends and family too much just in case they feel like I'm invading their privacy and not everyone is as comfortable as me to parade themselves on the internet. However my sister has finally made the move to write a blog, which I think is about time, to be honest.
Let me tell you why. My sister has probably been my idol since I can remember. What older sister isn't always the idol of the younger sister? And what young brother isn't always wanting to be like the older brother? The fact is is that as a child, all I ever wanted to be was her. I think I'm one of the rare few kids who was ever overjoyed to recieve hand-me-downs. Crazy, isn't it? I know.
Over time as we great up we grew apart as she became a crazy tyrant of a teenager and I was growing into a young, butt-minded school kid. At one point I swore I would never call her my sister again.
And then she moved away to university.
I would say it was like magic that we suddenly became best friends but I would say it was more like a slow brewing cup of tea. It happened the moment we left each other but only slowly but now we've become the strongest cup of tea there is. I think, even 'till this day, I would say that she is still very much my idol and I look up to her for strength and wisdom. (well I look downwards, she is shorter than me, would you believe!) If not for that then for laughter and plenty of fun times that only her and I will understand.
Another important thing to say is that i've always envied her in some many ways. Ways in which she probably won't even realise. I don't think even I realise sometimes until the green monkey (I mean monster) just jumps out at me. She has always been able to write in the way that I've always wanted to. She's always been a better artist, a better writer, she's better at games, smarter than me, she's wittier, better at languages and she's even a quicker learner than me. Do you think I've finished? No.
So when I sit there and look at her I think that if God somehow merged us together, we'd probably be the worlds greatest superhuman.
I love the way my sister writes. I love her way with words; words which I could only read but never write. Sometimes I don't even understand because my brain just doesn't reach that far. I could say it's because she read a lot as a child and wrote even more but then again I'm sure it was all within her from the moment she was born. From what we hear, she was talking and singing at 10 months and chatting with our customers at the age of 2. My sister was a wonder kid, did you know that?
I know a lot of you say that you like it when I'm more 'myself' and when I'm being a bit witty and cheeky. Well that is all the goodness that has rubbed off from my sister. She is talented and funny and sometimes I wonder how she is not ruling the world.
You need to go read her blog; she's only starting but I promise you she will write things that will teach you and make you laugh. She has comforting words and an ever so gentle touch that can reach out to anyone. I think everyone deserves a bit of Jamie and I suppose she deserves a bit of all of you.
Her blog - 'That is the why' will be a hit one day. Believe in her and join us in our journey!
And Jamie if you're reading this, stop crying or feeling touched. Go do something useful like make me a sandwich.
:)
PS. Here is a link to it if you didn't quite catch the one earlier. Click here!
I was in the kitchen not long ago when my sister came in and just randomly asked if I'd made my New Years Resolutions. It's funny that because the idea of New Years Resolutions (NYR) has been milling around my head for a while . When I say 'a while' I mean possibly the beginning of November 2009.
Last year (wow that sounds weird) I was and have been keen for a new start and actually incredibly eager to make 2010 brilliant because if I'm being honest 2009 was a completely cr*p year for me. So much rubbish stuff happened to me and the those around me and that's the funny thing, it seems I wasn't the only one to have a horrific 2009. However in some ways that doesnt make me feel less rubbish; it makes me feel more angry at I spent a whole year in this nightmare.
So I plan 2010 to be completely amazing; I want so many things to happen and I want to make the most and best of this year. I know realistically I can't expect too much but I know what I'm really capable of and I think my life is going to change this year. Looking back I remember making a youtube video declaring what my resolutions were for 2009 and so I'm going to quickly have a look at what they were and what's happened with those resolutions:
Continuously eat healthily and responsibly
Well actually it's not been bad this year for that. I think I lost about a stone or so in weight so it's been slow but kind of good. Did I continuously eat healthily and responsibly? No. But then again, who was I kidding?
To sleep 8 hours a day Nope that didn't happen either and let's face it, it's not going to happen is it? Like, ever. Either I Don't have the time and when I do have the time I'd rather sit down and watch Anime or aimlessly play Cafe World or Petville until 4am in the morning.
To spend resonsibly and save money for more important things OK that didn't happen either. The moment my loan came through I went absolutely biserk. So no, I didn't save a penny. If anything, I'm even more in debt. Argh!
Do more house chores I wish I could say I do do more chores but I don't. I think I cook even less because I'm so tired all the time. Oh my, this is looking horrendous.
To be a better girlfriend OK I might as well quit while I'm ahead
So as you can see 2009 was very much of a fail. I can't quite think of much I did achieve in 2009 besides passing my driving test. I guess I lost some weight too which was good. What else? No I can't think of much else. I can however think of 101 horrible things that happened. But let's not go there.
So like I said I've been thinking about it and with great brain juice I've managed to conjure up the most realistic yet ambitious ones yet. I think these are some that I might achieve unlike the pitiful hopefuls of last year.
So like I was saying when I thought about it I rushed into my room to write this entry before the inspiration goes. I've sat down with my big fat Christmas mug of hot chocolate (complete with a mountain full of mini mashmallows) (thanks Vicky ^_~) and my fingers began to itch. I'm about to make a pledge to 2010 and this is serious stuff.
1) Reach goal weight by December 9th 2010
She says whilst wolfing down the ludicurously delicious marshmallow 'goo' floating ontop of her decadently sweet hot chocolate (I got so excited I squealed when I buried my face in it)
No seriously once we restock the kitchen properly (the Christmas aftermath still lingers) and all the bad foods have been demolished or thrown away, I will carry on with Weight Watchers and by 2010 I will be 8 - 9 stones. That's not even that hard to acheive, so it's about 2 stones give or take in one year. If I can drop off 5lbs a month I could still do it! So yay so size 10 dresses!
2) I will stop living like a 5 year old
I look around me .... I live in a pig sty. I have a room that could easily be a 5 year old boy's. It's always messy and to be quite frank not always the most hygienic. So far I've kept my vanity table clean, tidy and pretty. It was my pilot test as to see whether I can do it and tomorrow I'm going to do a massive earlys spring clean and I will make sure it stays that way. The key is to just be tidy in general and never ignore mess. That's my problem, I've got so good at ignoring things that annoy me...even wrappers on the floor. I'm sorry but I wasn't properly house trained!! :D
3) I will make something of myself this 2010
See this one is quite open and free. The problem is is that I don't know what I want to do in life REALLY but all I know is I want to do something enjoyable and interesting. I've spent far too long doing something I do not enjoy and furthermore I've been far too long just living in existence and not making things happen. So this year, whatever it may be, I'm going to reshape my life bit by bit and remodel it into something amazing. I want to make the best of what I have and I want this 2010 to not only be a good'un for me but also for my family.
4) I will make more effort with my friends
Those often neglected by me will like this one. You see, it's not that I'm that much of a rubbish friends. Most will tell you that actually I'm a pretty darn good one...when I want to be. I have this problem where I spend a lot of time by myself; it has to be said, I love my own company. So a lot of the time, when I do have time, I will shut myself in and do whatever pleases me (which is mostly watching movies, doing my nails or internet shop). A lot of the times I won't make the effort to call or say "hey lets go out". More often than not I always wait till I get asked to go out and if I go it tends to be a miracle. This year I want to see my friends more and be a bit more sociable. I'm not going to party more (because that's just not me) but I want to show my face from time to time.
5) I will believe in love again
With what's happened since I started dating (oh those many years ago ...don't say a word!...) I've slowly gone from hopeless romantic to a seriously cynical romance hater. OK I wouldn't say I was a hater at all to be honest, I think really I'm still a closet hopeless romantic but I just have been battered down a lot. 2009 was probably as bad if not actually worse than 2007 and so yeah it's caused much disturbance towards my views on love and relationships. I've started to even think about not wanting marriage and believing that all men are quite frankly, dogs. Well I like dogs so maybe rats. But this year I'm going to try and stop looking at me like they've already done something wrong and give them a chance. My bestie said to be that 2010 she's going to start chatting them up and wanted me to join her. Although I find that hilarious I don't think she's in the wrong direction of things. You might not find me picking men up but you'll probably see a smile on my face when I talk to them, not my usual defensive scour of a frown.
So that's 2010! This year if I can acheive those things I will be healthy, happy, successful and in my way to greater things. I'm sure this year is going to be amazing.
Lastly I want to end this by telling those who have also had bad 2009s that it's not always going to be like this. I'm sure I've spent the last decade in a blur. Most of it has been ..well, horrible. I'm not saying my life is THAT BAD but there's been consistently nasty life events which have occured but I often remind myself of how good I really have it and I think about all the things I am thankful for. I then think about the possibility of a new tomorrow and then realise we're given a new slate even second; it's just a matter of rewiring the way you think. If you havent' changed your life or gone out of your way to make anothers' better, then 2010 is the time to do it. This year you're going to be everything you want to be. Goodbye horrible 2009 - hello amazing 2010!
This year I'm going to be positive!
Happy 2010 everyone!
PS. one more morose thought; is it a bad sign that the moment 2010 happened I had a tummy ache???
PPS. I suppose rather than seeing it as a bad omen, I will imagine its my body's way of sh*tting out all the crap! (o^_~o) HEEHEE!
Music used in video:
DBSK - Doushite (karaoke)
U-KISS - Not Young (karaoke)
SHINee - Replay (instrumental)
2Ne1 - I Don't care (karaoke)
It's not long until Christmas, what is everyone going to be doing?
I hope we all spare some time to forget about presents, about food and about not going to work for the holidays. I hope we have time to think about how lucky we are, how our general necessities are actually a luxury we take for granted and that this Christmas a lot of people will be lonely, hungry and away from home. Let's spend some time to say our thanks for our blessings and truly, madly, deeply tell everyone how much they mean to you.
It's not often that I write much about anything personal on this blog but I've long stopped writing at my personal blog because it reminds me too much of all the things that hurt me. But I've been craving to write personally for a while because it's been a an addiction since I was a young girl. Writing about feels really help me to de-clutter what's in my brain, sometimes I have so much in my head the thoughts begin to overlap one another and some are forgotten and somee keep springing to mind.
So here is a new beginning to a new section for this blog: Helen's Hideaway
You know I've been constantly thinking to myself about where life is taking me. To be honest these thoughts have been in my mind for a since I was a little girl; from a young age I've pondered on my purpose and wondered about my future. I used to always ask myself "Why me?" and I didn't understand what the question meant but it wasn't referring to why bad things happen to me. I was more asking Why I've been put on this Earth?
I guess before it wasn't so much of a question with a deeper meaning, just curiosity and confusion. If I ask the same question now I would be asking what my purpose is and what I can do in this life to really make a difference.
For all that know me, knows that my 'general' goal is to help save the world. I believe in some ways that I was given the heart I have for a reason and I know these hands are not just for eating and apply make up. Forget the question of what I want to do with as a job....what is my purpose?
I think I hit a certain point around college time when I realised what I was good at and what were my limits. I understood that being an 'all rounder' that sky is my limit so as long as I push myself. I didn't think I had much talent in anything that I loved and I don't excel in much either. But then again I don't do badly in much. I looked deep within and found that actually probably what the Big Guy above gave me was a good heart and a good soul. My job is to help others and no matter what I do, I will do it. I know that truthfully there are no limits to what I can achieve, I just have to really want it and do it. I know that no matter what I do in life, I will be helping people smile one way or another.
I recently watched a video of a favourite guru and her name is Elessa AKA Pursebuzz. Pursebuzz was the first make up guru I ever watched and I was instantly hooked on her talent but more so her warm heartedness. She recently uploaded a video talking more about herself, her job, her life and what she's been through. I know a lot of people will say this but I really felt like I understood her and everything that came out of that beautiful mouth was easily what was already in my brain.
Then it hit me ... this is what she has achieved....I can do it too.
My purpose in life is to share, to touch others hearts and to change the world for the good, bit by bit.
